I saw this post yesterday and it made me thinking, are we really entitled to multiple chances in life?! That we can always make better afterwards?!
Bible says God forgives (Psalm 86:5). He gives 2nd chance if you repent. He even told Peter to forgive not 7 times but 77 times (Matthew 18:21-22). It may be more but I think it is safe to only give what we can take in. I can forgive 77 people at once but not one person 77 times. I take chances but I hardly give 2nd chance to people who screw up unless they have proven they deserve it. Oftentimes I think, some people just use this “a-chance-to-re start” principle to justify the mess up and why they’re refusing to grow up.
No this isn’t about forgiveness. This is about what we should do and where we need to look into so we don’t need to ask for multiple forgiveness or chances or a re start with people or reset in life.
It isn’t bad to restart, to reset and refocus. What I don’t agree is that we think we are allowed to do it as many times as needed, that we are all entitled of infinite chances and beyond. That makes one reckless, care free, irresponsible and immature.
Okay, let’s say it’s valid, But aren’t we get tired of doing it over and over again and still getting the same results? Halt, restart, halt, repeat.
It isn’t a waste of time to try, but if we’re getting the same bullsh*ts even from trying with different approach or process, maybe, we need to ask ourselves why, and how is this routine keep on happening and still we’re not going anywhere. Perhaps what we need is not re starting or re setting but some sort of re-wiring, or changing our perspectives, or replacing old habits.
But before we can re wire, reevaluation is needed. It is a logical way of fixing an issue, we have to determine where it’s coming from, the source before we can do the needed repair. You can’t fix a broken car just by changing the tires alone. You need to check for dead battery, loose or corroded connection cables, or a bad alternator. I’m not good at car, but I am in driving and my experience tells me that when restarting the car that suddenly stopped didn’t work on second or third try, I have to open the hood to look at what might be the problem on hand. So you see, some issues don’t always require re-starting. Sometimes I call a friend too. Joke.
And just like every car that needs to move from a sudden halt, us human being have our own engines that convert our values to our actions and decisions in life, and I call this our value system. This value system is our sense of self and of others, our virtues, our principles, our morals and standards, our faith. And our own definition of commitment, our notion of respect and of justice, and of love, and all our judgments, our relationship with others arise from this value system. If this is broken to the core, we malfunction as human being. If this engine is damaged, no matter how we try to keep on connecting the wires, we can’t make a re-start to create a meaningful journey in life.
So we need to know; what we value the most, what we consider valuable to our growth, what makes us happy and what can bring us inner peace. Why can’t we love sincerely? Why can’t we forgive easily? Why can’t we move forward? Why do we always question people’s intentions? Why are we having self doubt? Why do we think, we aren’t enough?! We also have to contemplate on our priorities and goals, our own consistency. Why can’t we decide for ourselves, why do we keep changing our minds, why do we feel jealous of others, why can’t We be happy, why can’t we be contented on what we have and easily gives in to temptations of change because we need to prove something.
Although change isn’t bad, it is its consistency that exhausts our soul. And we only become inconsistent when we don’t know what our value system is. We become unconsciously anxious. Unaware of the unknown, we keep on changing the process without seeing the broken pattern we make, giving us either feeling of dissatisfaction or defeat.
We easily get off focus because we are already exhausted by this repeated scenario we have done in the past, we easily get off balance because we don’t have the strong solid anchor that keeps us steady, our value system.
If we don’t reevaluate this value system, we may lose the most valuable things in life aside from family and friends, our self worth. If we neglect reevaluating our values, we end up seeking revalidation and approval form others.
The more we think we can change anything, anytime we want, without taking into consideration the people around us and their emotions, the more these alterations consume us making us more inconsiderate of others until we become inconsiderate of what we feel too. The more we think we have more chances of restarting or re setting or refocusing without looking at our inner self, the less our chances to win in life. We want more from the outside, we lose more in the inside.
The more we do meaningless actions, the faster our soul deteriorates.
We crave for change and yet, we change for nothing because we have an unexamined life, it is as if we keep on trying for a meaningless head start.
Dig deep into your value system and look what’s trapping you. Fix what’s within you and you don’t need thousands of restarting to do.
At sa dinami dami kong sinabi, na summarize yan ni Lolo Socrates in just few words, “KNOW THYSELF because THE UNEXAMINED LIFE IS NOT WORTH LIVING.”
Hehe. Pinahaba ko talaga because it’s masherep. Chaaaar!
Wishing you all healing and mending and a great weekend ahead even it it’s not that long.