Shikata Ga Nai

Feb 28, 2025

The month comes to a close, and I find myself carrying a heavy heart. February has been relentless, filled with unforeseen pain, difficult truths, and moments that left deep scars.

Some things unraveled in ways I never anticipated, and no matter how much I wish I could turn back time or rewrite certain moments, I know that life doesn’t work that way. There are wounds that no apology can heal, choices that cannot be undone, and people who walk away, never looking back.

And yet, as much as it hurts, I remind myself of the Japanese saying shikata ga nai (仕方がない) or “it cannot be helped”. I would personally translate the phrase as: “It is what it is. We don’t always have control over our lives.”

Shikata ga nai yo!

Because true enough, some things are beyond my grasp, people’s decisions, the way they choose to remember me, the way circumstances unfold despite my best efforts. I could spend forever questioning the “what ifs” and “if onlys,” but it would change nothing. No amount of regret or resistance can change what has already happened. The only choice left is acceptance, not as surrender, but as an acknowledgment that life moves forward whether I’m ready or not.

The past is a closed door, and no matter how hard I knock, it will not open again. Holding on to what is already lost will only make the present heavier.

Hooray to you, self! You did it!

Still, even in the midst of sorrow, I hold on to gratitude. Pain has a cruel way of teaching lessons, ones I may not have wanted but perhaps needed. It strips away illusions, reveals the true nature of people, and forces growth in ways comfort never could. February has tested me, but it has not left me empty. I carry its lessons, its reminders, and its quiet wisdom.

Tomorrow, March begins. Though my heart is weary, I choose to welcome it with hope. Like the cherry blossoms that bloom after enduring the coldest winters, I trust that even after the harshest seasons, beauty and renewal will come. Perhaps the weight I carry today will lighten with time. Perhaps, in the days ahead, I will find peace where pain once resided.

For now, I take a deep breath, turn the page, and move forward—because just like March, midterms are fast approaching. Time to shift my focus to reading. Yay!