(For those whose presence I carry, even across the miles, and whose memory keeps the world gentle.)

Mobile: 0348.915.159
The small shop on Hàng Điếu was the kind of place you could walk past without ever noticing. A few silver packets of chè ướp hoa nhài (jasmine-scented tea) sat neatly on the counter, their faint perfume already softening the air. The woman behind it doesn’t speak English, but when our eyes met, she smiled so wide it startled me, the kind of smile that felt like recognition, not courtesy.
Her husband did most of the talking, his voice soft but sure as he explained how chè ướp hoa nhài — jasmine tea is made.
He said the flowers are picked at dusk, when their scent is fullest, and laid over green tea leaves from Thái Nguyên. Through the night, the tea waits. still, quiet, absorbing the breath of each blossom. By morning, the flowers are gone, but their memory lingers in the leaves.
“They sleep together,” he said, searching for the right words, “and in the morning, the tea remembers the flower.”
I nodded as if I understood, though what stayed with me isn’t just the story but the way it was told — slow, deliberate, without haste. There’s a kind of patience in it, the kind that lives in people who’ve made peace with time.
That night, brewing the tea, not with boiling water, but warm enough only to wake the leaves, I understood what they meant. The leaves and the blossoms share a night, an intimacy of darkness and scent. And though the petals are gone, the tea carries their essence.
This quiet, retained fragrance became my metaphor for the endurance of love. For the tea to gain this deep fragrance, the delicate blossom must sacrifice its own brief, perfect perfume into the sturdy leaf. And the leaf, in turn, must wait in the darkness, accepting that foreign scent as its own. This act of quiet, mutual becoming is why the memory holds so beautifully.
This quiet, deep fragrance became my way to explain lasting love. It’s a love that is not made quickly or in moments of rush, but slowly, in the quiet time, like the tea leaves overnight. For the tea to get this deep, long-lasting scent, the small, soft flower has to give its whole, perfect smell to the strong tea leaf. And the leaf, for its part, has to wait in the dark and let that new, gentle scent become part of itself forever. This quiet way of changing each other, where the flower’s beauty becomes the leaf’s strength, is why the memory lasts so wonderfully.

In Hanoi, you’ll often find jasmine tea served:
After a heavy meal, to refresh the palate.
During quiet morning hours, paired with a small plate of sunflower seeds or bánh cốm.
Or in old tea houses, where the act of pouring tea itself is a silent language, a gesture of respect, patience, and peace.

In Vietnamese culture, chè ướp hoa nhài symbolizes:
Purity and calm (from the jasmine blossom),
Groundedness and endurance (from the green tea),
and the belief that gentle things can also be strong.


We endure the hard seasons, the long-term commitment, the necessary compromises, the waiting, the silence, not because love is easy, but because the memory of connection is worth the cost. True love is not a rush of heat; it is the slow infusion that only happens under pressure and in the dark.
It is this profound, infused essence that defies distance and, eventually, even time itself. Love, I realized, is what remains after the person is gone. It is the deep flavor of the leaf that has been permanently altered by the presence of the flower. Even when the beloved ‘flower’ is taken by the current of time, that memory settles into the fibers of who we are. It is the gentle certainty that, even in the silence of grief, the tea remembers.
This is one of the letters that didn’t make it to the “unsent folder* I’m sending it instead, to those whose scent I carry with me, who have left their mark quietly but completely on my soul. You remind me that the greatest love isn’t always the loudest; it’s the connection that, after all the endurance and all the sacrifice, always remembers the flower.
A Note Before You Send:
I made this letter for you to send to someone if you feel like it. This is not to rush you, but do not wait for the time to be perfect. The beauty of this message is in the enduring essence of your connection; it deserves to be shared right now.
My dearest [Recipient’s Name/Pet Name],
I wrote the accompanying piece thinking of you, of course. It’s my attempt to give a name to that quiet, deep force that sustains us, the one that feels less like a sudden passion and more like a permanent state of being.
I think of the tea leaves, waiting in the dark to absorb the jasmine’s essence. That’s what our life together has been, hasn’t it? A long, slow infusion. We haven’t just had the bright, easy days; we’ve had the dark, quiet seasons too, the moments of pressure, the endurance that makes us stronger. You never flinched from the necessary compromises or the shared burdens. It was in those silent moments that the scent, the true essence of your love, settled into my soul.
The tea man said, “In the morning, the tea remembers the flower.” And that’s what I want you to know: you are my flower. Every conversation, every sacrifice, every shared silence. it hasn’t just been experienced, it’s been absorbed. Even when we are apart, or when life feels busy and noisy, the memory of your quiet strength is permanently infused in the flavor of my life.
I don’t just love you for your presence; I love you for the indelible, gentle mark you have left on the person I’ve become.
Thank you for being the one whose memory I will always carry.
Forever,
[Your Name]


Leave a comment